Oh, this writerly life

It seems like every time I turn around, some new surprise is happening in the little niche of the publishing world with which I am familiar. People are changing publishers, publishers are changing policies, agents quit to become editors or vice versa.

I'm not sure if it's just because I'm getting older, but it seems like the pace of this is happening faster and faster. Or maybe it's because I'm still not sure where I'm going with this career of mine.

There's nothing wrong with where I am. I have a lot of books out, I enjoy writing, I enjoy my day job, and I like the way it all fits together. But I always have this nagging feeling that maybe I should be doing more -- looking for an agent, or looking for a New York contract, or trying to self-publish, or doing a bit more promo.

I wonder if this is just human nature, to constantly wonder: Am I doing enough?

And just when I think this kind of thinking is important, someone gets ill and I discover what the really important things are in life. I think a health crisis for a loved one is a reminder to us: it's really just a job, people. Don't sweat it. There are other things far, far more important in this world.

Mechele was right: life comes at you fast

I had the flu on Wednesday night -- all night, on the bathroom floor, ugly -- flu. To add insult to injury, I'd also had 2 bursitis shots in my hips earlier in the day, so lying on the floor was amazingly painful. Oh, and I also had 2 hours of dental work done earlier in the day, so I had a headache and jaw ache that was unbelievable. Then I got the flu!

I was whipped on Thursday and pretty much vegged out in between steralizing my house: loads of laundry, wiping down surfaces, etc. On Friday I thought I was okay so I went to the office, but I got beat really fast so came home and stayed unmotivated all day, lounging in front of TV, a thing I NEVER do. I dabbled in email, did a couple of edits, considered my WIP, then said, 'ah, the hell with it.'

I'm feeling somewhat normal today, at least able to face the possibility of doing a few errands and resuming my life. The upside of all this has been I lost weight (8 pounds) and it's made me realize some things about my relationship to food. For example: I really don't need to eat that much food in one day. I got along on Thursday with a lot less than I thought I needed and managed okay. If I bump up my portion sizes just a tad, it would be right.

It also made me realize that I can afford to take a day off now and again. My 'schedule' is really flexible and I can decide if I want to participate in group chats, blogs, etc., or not. I can vanish for a few days and it's all okay.

I'm on vacation for 10 days now (wow. It's been a LONG time since I had that kind of vacation). I'm at home until Wednesday when we're off to Florida for a writing adventure. I'm so thankful to have the flu behind me and a vacation ahead of me. I'll do a few 'to do things' today then I can veg out once again, resume edits, think about my WIP, and start to get back to normal...

Not a bad end to a bad week ....

Life lessons from a car purchase

Hooray! I got a new car. I picked it up last night.

My 'old' car wasn't old -- it was just 2 years old. But I wasn't comfortable driving it. I had all-wheel drive before I bought it, and I really missed it. And here in the snowy North, AWD is very, very useful.

So I bit the bullet and talked the Spousal Unit into a new purchase. I forced him to test drive with me so we can be sure he fits (he had a problem with the old car which he neglected to mention until the purchase was done. Oops).

I agonized over the color choices -- should I get the green/gray with the off-white interior? Or the dark gray/silver with the black interior? I loved the green/gray color but I was worried about the dirt in the off-white interior. I thought about it, I paced, I read reviews, I looked at Scotchgard (c) products, I debated ...

I got the gray one. It was $1000 less and the interior sold me. As I drove it home through blowing snow I was so happy. It handles like a dream, it's quick, it's responsive, it's quiet, it's everything I wanted. I realized that the exterior is largely irrelevant. I don't see the exterior that much. I see the interior. And while I loved the look of the ivory/beige interior, I know in a year I'd be worried about that coffee stain, that scuff mark, or the spill in the rear hatch.

Life lesson? It's what's inside that counts -- the engine and the interior. Both cars were identical except for color (and price). Don't be swayed by fancy looks (or fancy book covers) and take a chance on what's inside. It's almost always the best choice.